15 Reasons Your Cat Thinks You’re the One Who Needs Training
You always wanted to be a cat owner and finally decided to get one.
Then, after a period of time, you thought – “Why not train this kitty?”
Hell yeah, what a great idea.
But over time, you slowly came to a realization – You’re not the owner, the kitty is.
Talk about a facepalm moment.
From feeding her on time to acknowledging her headbutts at 3am in the morning, your cat’s made it crystal clear – she’s your owner and she’s gonna make sure you’re trained properly.
Trained to properly serve her, entertain her, and heck, even earn to take care of her needs and luxuries.
Here are 15 subtle (and not-so-subtle) ways your cat is teaching you how to behave, according to their very high standards.
Image credit – Instagram@ralph_yall
1. You Still Don’t Understand the Meow System
One meow means feed me.
Two meows mean feed me faster.
Three? You messed up, and now the blinds get destroyed.
Image credit – Instagram@tofy_thecaramelcat
2. You Don’t Respect the Zoomies
You keep trying to “calm them down” when they’re doing laps at 2:43 AM.
Wrong.
That’s sacred training time. You’re the distraction.
Image credit – Instagram@catpurred
3. You Keep Closing Doors Like You Own the Place
Excuse me?
Every door is open until I decide otherwise.
Even the bathroom. Especially the bathroom.
She gotta check what you’re doing in the bathroom as well (literally mine does, lol)
Image credit – Instagram@kasumirugby
4. You Still Haven’t Mastered the Litter Box Maintenance Schedule
If it’s not pristine by 10:07 a.m., you’re getting the look.
The one that says, “Maybe you’re not cut out for this job.”
It’s time she found a new servant.
Image credit – Instagram@karenkmetals
5. You Don’t Know the Proper Way to Be Sat On
Stop squirming.
You are a couch. I am royalty.
This is not a negotiation.
Image credit – Instagram@milo_siamesemix
6. You Still Think You Pick the Feeding Time
Cute.
You think you’re in control. But I’ve scheduled dinner for 2 hours earlier — every day.
Be ready to expect the unexpected.
Image credit – Instagram@mortyandbubbles
7. You Try to Sleep In
I said 5:12 a.m., not 5:30.
My tail in your face is your alarm.
You missed it. Training penalty.
Image credit – Instagram@6_gatos_amigos
8. You Keep Buying Toys I Didn’t Approve
That $30 electronic mouse? Useless.
Your framed photos? Oh yes.. Let’s scratch ’em.
The crumpled receipt from your pocket? My new best friend.
Image credit – Instagram@nehmacat
9. You’re Still Sitting in My Spot
The sunbeam? Mine.
The laptop keyboard? Mine.
Your freshly folded laundry? Also mine.
Image credit – Instagram@kabisau_woodymui
10. You Don’t Get the Blinking Language
A slow blink means “I love you.”
Blink back, human. Blink back!
Honestly, how are we still working on this?
Image credit – Instagram@ulofamilly
11. You Think the Couch is Off-Limits During Claw Practice
Scratching posts are fine, but forbidden furniture hits different.
It’s about rebellion.
You wouldn’t understand.
Image credit – Instagram@laura_boog
12. You Still Think You’re Allowed to Move Your Legs at Night
Wrong.
Once I settle on you, you’re locked in.
Twitch, and we reset to Day 1 of obedience class.
Image credit – Instagram@lote_no_stendes
13. You Talk Too Much
I meow with purpose.
You babble like a fool.
Shh. I’m trying to vibe.
Image credit – Instagram@bree_british
14. You Make Eye Contact Without an Offering
Approaching the throne empty-handed?
Bold move.
Try again with treats.
Image credit – Instagram@venice_photographer_hao
15. You Haven’t Realized You’re the Intern
You clean up.
You serve meals.
You live under surveillance.
And honestly? You’re doing okay, but we’ve got work to do.
If you made it this far without being interrupted by a dramatic tail flick or judgmental stare, congrats — your training is almost complete. 😼
Now, be a good human and share this with someone else who’s clearly being trained by their cat, too.
Let’s unite all the cat butlers out there — one hairball at a time.
